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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24126661">Nights like this</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/scotchandwhitelies/pseuds/scotchandwhitelies'>scotchandwhitelies</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Domestic Fluff, Drabble, M/M, repost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:14:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,628</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24126661</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/scotchandwhitelies/pseuds/scotchandwhitelies</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky can't sleep because his husband has stolen all the covers.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>119</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Nights like this</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There are times Bucky can't sleep because of war. On nights like this, his lids would twitch with memories of snapping bones and cries for help he can't answer, mind trapped in his own body.</p><p>On nights like this, his broad frame would be tortured by tremors, and he'd try his best to stifle whimpers of pain. As a veteran himself, Sam knows best than to touch Bucky until he realizes he's safe in the solace of their bedroom. Then Bucky would get scooped up in his husband's tender embrace and Sam would whisper words of affirmation onto his sweat slick skin.</p><p>There's none of that tonight.</p><p>Bucky can't find sleep because of a completely mundane reason. The pleasantly warm bed he dozed off in is now cold. It takes a minute for his groggy eyes to consider the culprit on the other end of the bed. His husband, who is usually the most selfless person he knows, is heaping up all the covers, and Bucky's egyptian cotton pillows on top of that. Sam is practically drooling on Bucky's favorite cushion, the camel one with embroidered lines that costed him sixty dollars on Sheridan. He huffs an annoyed sigh then, rolling on his back to contemplate the overhead alcove formed by oak cupboards.</p><p>The stillness in the room is only interrupted by Sam's steady snoring and his own breathing. The silence is less intimidating with each year that goes.</p><p>Bucky used to hate it. He hated being left with his own thoughts for too long because then, self awareness and anxiety would eat him up. Tell him he's not enough, that he doesn't deserve any of this. This wedding band on his finger, this sense of peace, this second shot at happiness, when he has so much blood on his hands.</p><p>But thanks to Sam's understanding and unshakable love, Bucky is slowly running out of reasons to hate himself.</p><p>Bucky scratches idly at his chest at the thought. There's one dream, one selfish wish he's been keeping to himself for quite a long time now.</p><p>His eyes shut momentarily. He could practically hear it, the pitter patter of small feet running around. He swallows hard, turns his head to study Sam's profile. The only lighting in the room comes the moon.</p><p>Bucky shudders at the cold night air then, scooting close to feel the heat radiating off Sam's body. His husband is kind and beautiful. But he is a greedy man and he wants more.</p><p>It's not that Sam doesn't make his chest brim with happiness already. Bucky just wants share that love. He wants to see Sam's face soften even more as he gets to lift their child in his arms.</p><p>He lies sideways, leaning on his elbow.</p><p>"Not my grilled schrimp", Sam mumbles, voice laced with sleep.</p><p>Bucky's mouth twitches. He deliberately pinches Sam's nose.</p><p>"Idiot", he says fondly, "Stealin' all my pillows. The audacity."</p><p>Sam's brows would pucker but he still keeps babbling in between snores. Bucky tries to tug at the covers in vain. There's a last ace up his sleeve though, a quite cruel one. He muses over it a minute before intertwining his legs with Sam's, caressing his thick calves with his cold feet.</p><p>"Man, what the hell...", Sam says, voice still slurred with slumber. He blinks repeatedly, brows furrowed as his eyes adjust to the darkness.</p><p>"Serves you right. You stole all the covers", Bucky gruffs, though his hand reaches for Sam's beard, trimmed nails lightly scratching there.</p><p>Sam grumbles some inaudible thing and in a split second, Bucky almost swallows soft cushions.</p><p>"Eat it then", Sam says, and he lies sideways to keep watching Bucky too.</p><p>Bucky clicks his tongue but still manoeuvers the pillows back under his head, sighing in relief because they're warm and feel like foam.</p><p>"I can't believe you woke me up like that, you traitor", his husband trails, pushing back the covers and hoisting himself up so he spreads them back evenly. Bucky almost purrs at how soft the sheets feel on his skin. Sam snuggles closer and winds an arm around Bucky's form.</p><p>"Happy now ?"</p><p>"Elated", Bucky says, enjoying the bubble of tenderness for a little while.</p><p>Then he breaks the silence.</p><p>"Sam ?"</p><p>A disgruntled groan answers me but he tries again.</p><p>"You sleepin' ?"</p><p>"I'm not. Obviously."</p><p>Bucky rolls his eyes, but his hands still clutch the covers to find courage. How should he tell about this ? Is it even the right timing ? What if Sam doesn't even want children ? They barely broached the subject before. God, he's so stupid.</p><p>"Stop that", Sam sighs.</p><p>"Wh-what ?"</p><p>"You're thinking so loud May Parker can hear you too."</p><p>Bucky stills at the mention of their elderly neighbor, an adorable woman who is almost deaf, so much that she still thinks Bucky's name is Billy after four months of cohabitation.</p><p>"At least, I'm doing the thinking for both of us", he retaliates.</p><p>Sam tugs on a chocolate strand of hair then.</p><p>"What does that mean huh ?"</p><p>"Nothin. I'm just tired and cranky."</p><p>"Don't give me that, Barnes", Sam says, his voice half threat and half promise. The kind of tone that makes Bucky want to be bad just to rile him up even more. But there will be time for that later.</p><p>Now, Sam is searching for certainty and honesty. Bucky doesn't even think of hiding. Sam would read the words under his silences anytime.</p><p>He blows out a breath.</p><p>"I think I want one of those small humans", he confesses, hiking the covers up until they hide half of his face.</p><p>Sam arches a skeptical brow. "This can mean you either want a garden gnome or a child. Which way is it ?"</p><p>"A gard- ? Of course I want a child, you dummy. I want a baby. Your baby actually", he huffs, almost offended.</p><p>Realizes he just fell into the trap from the way Sam's shoulders shake with mirth.</p><p>"I hate you", he grumbles.</p><p>"No you don't", Sam replies, tightening his hold on Bucky's frame, and pressing a gentle kiss on his temple.</p><p>Bucky fights the slack grin that threatens to spread on his face.</p><p>"Yeah, I don't, which is why I'm crazy enough to consider raising a kid with you..."</p><p>Sam takes pause. Bucky hopes he's not offended. Then his husband slowly releases him, and turns on his back, staring at the ceiling.</p><p>"If you hate the idea, just tell me", Bucky says with a small voice.</p><p>Sam shakes his head. "Let a brother digest the news a little, man. I didn't know you wanted kids."</p><p>"Well, it's a fairly new development."</p><p>"Really ? Since when ?"</p><p>"Two years and a half."</p><p>His husband does the math, and then plasters a fond smile on his face. That's just how long they've been married. For a moment, Bucky just inhales the smell of them in the air. Clean sweat, wood, lavender. His entire body is thrumming with trepidation as he awaits Sam's answer.</p><p>"It's not gonna be easy", Sam says with a tightness in his voice. Bucky turns his head to watch him.</p><p>He's beautiful like this, miles of dark skin bathed in the moonlight, body thick with knotted muscles and toned chest rising and falling to the rhythm of his steady breathing. While Bucky is bigger in terms of mass, Sam always looks like he escaped the mind of some renaissance carver.</p><p>"I know", he says softly.</p><p>"We'll have to take a lawyer", Sam trails, "And find a reliable agency..."</p><p>Their eyes lock in the dark.</p><p>"I know the procedures", Bucky says.</p><p>Of course he knows. He needed to come prepared. Got his heart broken a few times at stories of surrogates changing their minds. Birth parents reclaiming their rights. And let's not ignore the obvious. They might be married but they're still two men. It can act as a repellent alone for people who think of their relationship as a quote unquote lifestyle. It's truly daunting but for once, the fear still doesn't stop hope from taking roots beneath Bucky's chest.</p><p>Sam exhales slowly.</p><p>"We're so good together..."</p><p>Bucky shuts his eyes then. He awaits the impending rest of that sentence. Something about the two of them being enough. And though it's true, though Sam is everything and then some, Bucky still wants more.</p><p>"I wouldn't mind adding a child to that, you know. Yeah, I think we can make a great job raising someone", Sam smiles.</p><p>Bucky nods, a smile curving his lips. His extremities tingle with pleasure at Sam's compliment. At how much he trusts in them.</p><p>"You sure about this, right ?"</p><p>Sam cradles his cheek. "Yeah, Buck. I'm sure. And I'm so proud and happy that you're thinking about the future now..."</p><p>Bucky blows out a relieved breath, blinking back tears. Chokes on air so that he can't express his happiness properly.</p><p>"You okay, love ?"</p><p>He slings an arm over his eyes and nods in silence. Sam chuckles softly, thumb idly stroking Bucky's neck.</p><p>"I warn you though, old man", Sam says.</p><p>"What ?"</p><p>"If it's a girl, be prepared to spend the rest of your life in pig tails."</p><p>Bucky feels a pleasant flush creeping up his throat and cheeks. A daughter. That sounds nice. Really nice. He thinks he'd love a little girl, one smart enough to lead the both of them by the nose.</p><p>"Why just me ? You're not safe either", he quips back.</p><p>Sam chuckles, eyes shutting in contentment.</p><p>"We're not having this conversation again, man. I refuse to grow my hair out."</p><p>Bucky huffs a fond annoyed sigh at that.</p><p>"It's not just about the hair, Wilson. I was actually thinking of you walking into your office with painted nails."</p><p>The sudden way Sam's eyes bulge sends Bucky spiraling into laughter.</p>
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